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Choking Myself to Death with the Jump rope

Okay, the joke is over. This is hitting my mental illness bone. I’m literally in so much pain right now from doing these exercises, I bought into a program calls VShed. “Oh, anyone can do it!”

“‘Doesn’t matter where you're at!” I call bull shit. This program had me in tears this morning doing the exercises. AND THIS IS THE FIRST DAY! Then there are the meals that go along with the program. You have to eat every three hours. How does adding calories help? I eat one meal each day with some snacking, like an apple or some yogurt. This program has you eating three meals and then snacking in between. If I did that I wouldn’t be able to walk from being so full. I don’t know, maybe I’m just full of shit. Maybe this is what I gotta do to get what I want. But just like booty busting aerobics on Fridays, I’m groaning. I’m feeling like I’m putting too much of my self esteem into this and I’m getting scared I won’t succeed. Just continue to be the blob I am today. What if I come to the realization that this is me forever. I would be devastated. That is a place we don’t want Annie to be. Then the Boogey Man comes. I can’t handle that.

I understand that being healthy is important to me and is important for my mental well-being. I get that. BUT IT HURTS.

I have to do four minutes of jumping jacks to warm up according to this program. HA! Or to jump rope for four minutes, come on people chime in on this...

Doesn’t sound like a lot right? Try it. I don’t care what shape your in, you’re going to want to choke yourself with the jumprope,

I would ask all my peeps out there to wish me warm thoughts as I try to go through this transformation. I think I should not buy a jump rope.


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