I CALL BULLSHIT

Ok, so that was all bullshit. No. Thats not true, it’s mostly bullshit. It’s not as easy as I make it sound, I’m literally being emotionally stripped by this one, I have the molestation memory constantly with me. I have no explanation for it. I just do. So I’m in a state of constant shame and guilt. I feel like a scared little girl being coerced into doing something I knew was wrong all the time. Now I know in the post I said just write it out and replace it with the truth. It was not my fault. I had no resources or anyone to protect me, It was his bad and he should live with this hell instead of me. w/ho knows maybe he does, A big part of me hopes he does. He was the terror of my childhood. So I had to call bullshit on how easy this is. It’s more than just replacing it with a better thought process although its the answer, just really raw right now I guess, So for all of those who read this who have experienced the same thing, I’m in your corner. It’s a little harder than just writing some words down. Oh boy am I raw right now. I’m in quite the snit, As I should be. This is not like coloring inside the lines. This is like those sharp blades running inside my head, This has been my lifetime monster. Some one please comment and give me hope that it will end. I don’t want to fall over into the hospital again over this. I feel like I could. Blades. Blades. Blades. I am going crazy